Declutter Your Mind by SJ Scott and Barrie Davenport
“How to stop worrying, relieve anxiety, and eliminate negative thinking”
Overarching Thoughts
Declutter Your Mind was a great, easy read. As someone who does live a life that requires me to constantly be on the go, it made me reassess what is truly essential. There are times I am sure I am “going” just to go, and this book 100% made me think about that.
The layout of this read was also amazing. Scott and Davenport divided it into four well thought out sections:
- Decluttering Your Thoughts
- Decluttering Your Life Obligations
- Decluttering Your Relationships
- Decluttering Your Surroundings
I loved that they did it like this because it allowed me to zone in on the areas where I needed to, and skim the areas where I have it a little more together. During this book review, I will be dividing my thoughts up the same way.
The only thing I didn’t like: the complacent comparison of “worrying” to “anxiety”. The two are not the same. Chronic anxiety is very different than having worries. That being said, if you are a frequent worrier, this is a great read.
Declutter Your Thoughts
This section was interesting to me, since it had several components to it that I felt closer to than I realized. It talks a lot about the power of meditation, which is something I haven’t explored yet.
The Four Main Causes of Stress
This section opens up with these, and wow I suffer from 3 of the 4 on a daily basis. The book lists the causes are: daily stress, the paradox of choice, too much “stuff”, and the negativity bias. While I do think I try to take things as they come rather than acting rash (most of the time), the other three hit me.
Daily Stress
Of course everyone is going to suffer from this. We are living during a pandemic. People are dying. Global warming is a real thing. Money stress is painful. I think that I internalize daily stress more than others, and it ends up eating at me. The ability to feel the pain of others is both a blessing and a curse, and you can’t always turn it off even if you want to.
Paradox of Choice
This is my biggest downfall – I can’t make a decision to save my LIFE. I honestly was shocked when I was so set on my wedding dress so quickly, since I was the child who used to have a meltdown in the candy store over too many options. This also has been an issue in my adult life which has negatively impacted me financially. For a long time, rather than making said choice, I would just get both! Not the brightest idea, but it happens. It is something I am consciously working on.
Too Much "Stuff"
As a result of this read, I am purging a lot of things that are unnecessary from my home. Some items are being donated, and others are being sold. I’m beginning to realize I am happier with just the basics for everything, which is an amazing discovery.
Negativity Bias
The negativity bias is seeing things as though they are worse than they are. It is a natural response according to the book. We are told by our natural reactions to “overestimate threats” and underestimate things such as resources. Especially as a woman, this response is 1) good and 2) normal. But only to a degree. You don’t want it controlling your whole life. That being said, especially in today’s world, I would hate to not trust that instinct.
Decluttering Your Life Obligations
My New Year’s resolution for the past couple of years has been to stop overcommitting myself. Just say no. You know the drill… obviously that hasn’t happened yet.
This is a tough one. If you are like me and have a highly demanding job, it can be tough to declutter your life or to stop overcommitting. It truly is all mental; you have to consciously realize you are about to make a commitment unintentionally even if you want to, if that makes sense. Even in the midst of the pandemic I was overcommitting myself to too many Zoom happy hour calls! Having a side gig doesn’t help with this either. If you have read my article on blogging, you understand that it is more than posing for photos. It is real work to run a full time side gig. I get questions quite often about how I do it and the answer is simple… My life is cluttered and full of obligations.
Thoughts on this chapter
I really liked how this chapter outlined how people who are overly busy tend to not be thinking about their core values or priorities. Some even are busy just to be busy. I also liked that the authors’ talked about decluttering your obligations through prioritization, and spoke about passions. There are some key action items I took away from this section and am looking forward to completing. The main one is goal setting, and using a S.M.A.R.T. (an acronym from the book) technique to get there.
Decluttering Your Relationships
This chapter hit me harder than I thought it would. While I know I am a giver, I also know I am blessed with some fantastic relationships. My friends and fiance are beyond loyal, and I know that is something I can’t (and don’t!) take for granted.
The part of the chapter that hit me was the one about leaving behind toxic relationships. This was tough because I am the type to give my all. I have been known to go above and beyond in relationships that barely give any effort in return, and reading this made me realize how often that happens. “Let go of certain people” is easier said than done. I like that this chapter made me mindful of this and gave me the opportunity to reassess certain relationships, particularly those who are only in it when it is convenient for them.
Decluttering Your Surroundings
This is the section I needed and honestly it came at the best time. I am not an organized person. My brain just does not work like that. Call me type B, or whatever else, but I just can’t for the life of me keep things organized. Do I like organizing initially? Yes. But does it stay that way? Absolutely not. There were three chapters in this section that impacted me/made me think: simplify your home, simplify your digital life, and simplify your distractions.
Simplify Your Home
This section inspired me to really get myself in line. Since reading it, I have been working on my closet and all rooms in the house to get them straightened up. Harry and I have so much stuff that we don’t need! This chapter was an awesome wake up call that we can live with so much less than we have.
Simplify Your Digital Life
I will admit, going through my phone is something I have been putting off. There are so many unnecessary photos and apps on it that I get overwhelmed. It is now on my to-do list though, which is always the first step.
Simplify Your Distractions
I am horrible at this! Between work, the blog, trying to keep the apartment clean… there are a million ways I distract myself. And I do often think about what all I could be doing with the time I’ve wasted, but for some reason, I keep wasting it! I liked that this chapter talked about mindfulness and how we should do everything with intention so that everything in life is more meaningful. This is an action item I am excited to incorporate into my life.
Final Thoughts on the Book
Declutter Your Mind was a great read for anyone who is struggling with stress due to mental and physical clutter. I enjoyed learning about ways to cope with this type of stress and now have some amazing action items to implement!
